Friday, August 24, 2012

The Metal Tube Season 1 Chapter 1 Stone age

Three days ago I had started a time race, when you go through the the turning portal with nine other people. There are two people chosen from each continent. The time race is like a reality tv show that none wants to win. When you go through the portal you go back in time to the dinosaur age. There you must search for the next time portal. The next time portal in the dinosaur age only allows nine people to enter so 1 person will be left behind in time. You must find the next portal but at the same time you must fight against the locals. You are allowed to be helped by the locals. You can use any type of transportation from riding on a Stegosaurus to a big heavy tank. There are ten time portals (Including the starting portal) so that means only one person shall win the time race. These are the nine ages that the winner would have had to go through. Dinosaur age, Stone age, Ice age, Dark age, Medieval age, French revelution, Modern era, Space age and the Robot era before returning back home.

So now to me. I’m in the stone age. All around me are cavemen and cavekids playing. I can hear the cave kids screaming and running around. I’ve got a gash across my leg. I got the gash from a clash with an aleptiosaur back in the dinosaur age. I can smell a rotting bull around 10 meters away from me. I see a mango on a palm tree, I haven’t eaten anything besides a plesiosaur which tasted like cocoa beans in red pepper inside some steak. I stand up and limp over to the palm tree. I hit the tree with a stone (something not hard to find) and the mango falls down. I pick up the juicy orangy yellow fruit and stuff it in my mouth.

A palm leaf came down with the mango which gives me an idea. I scrape some bark off a pine tree mush it up with two rocks and gently pat down my wound with the mushy bark. Then I pick off some sticky resin on the palm tree and pat it around the edge of the palm leaf then I stick the palm leaf to my leg to stop any bugs from reaching my wound. the palm leaf feels gentle on my leg it is as soft as silk. The palm leaf reminds me of back home, when mother would always let the cat into my bed and the cat would always crawl around at night. My daydream was interrupted with a loud grunt from a barbarian looking person. “yabadabadoo!” and the barbarian thing laughs and runs away.

I look around, it looks like it will be dark out in no time so I find the cave that I came through from the dinosaur age. I see that the portal had disappeared while I was out exploring. Then a big picture forms in the sky showing a picture of the time trap mug shot. It shows a picture of the person stuck in the previous age and their name and continent. This guy was from Asia and his name is Jwut Geehern.

That night while I was lying sleeplessly on the ground of the cave I recognised a slight light coming from the mountain at the horizon then I see it flicker... It must be the next time portal!
So that night instead of sleeping I was looking for food and resources for my trip. It would be a long way probably 100 km away. I needed lots of water and food. I started to get slow with my produce because of my leg. I sat down and leaned against the tree where I got the palm leaf from. I peeled off the palm leaf which caused a bit of pain. Like when you peel off a bandage that you’ve had on for a few days. I saw that the mushed bark didn’t heal the wound that much. I wiped off the sticky resin and the overpouring mushy bark. I saw that the gash had swollen a bit. I lean back on the tree and look up to the stars.

I think I might be crazy but the stars seem to form an arrow I look at the place where the arrow was pointing and I see a little tube poking out of the bushes I crawl over to the bush being weary of my wound. When I reach the bush I see that the tube was bigger than I thought it was. I look at this case I read what it says press to open. I press the case and it opens there is a button under the sealed case I press the button and the front of the tube opens. I peep in and I see a medicine pack. I rapidly open the lid and pad down my wound and it heals instantly! I look at the back of the metal tube. I crawl in and find a teleportation device. I press the teleport button and I teleport to the next time portal in the forest. I take a deep breath and step into the time portal...



  1. Fantastic ideas in this story, Stefan. I love how you set it up with an introduction. It feels like a movie, with each paragraph a scene in the movie. You link your scenes together so well. The reader gets a great picture of exactly what is happening and why!

    I look forward to chapter two :)

  2. Stefan, I can't wait for the next chapter. I have really enjoyed trying to guess what is coming next as I read. You really keep the reader guessing with the twists and turns in the text. Email me your next chapter please.

  3. It is awesome Stefan! I love your writing it as a lot of awesome ideas in it. If chapter 1 is sooo awesome I can't wait for chapter 2! WELL DONE:c)

  4. Awesome Stefan.
    I love your ending. It is great.
    I can't wait to see the next chapter.

  5. Amazing Stefan. I love that story I can't wait for chapter two.

  6. Awesome Stefan.
    I can't wait till chapter 2.Keep up the GREAT work.

  7. WOW Stefan, what an amazing writer you are. Awesome use of similes and amazing detail. I too can't wait for chapter 2 - share it with me too please!

  8. Awesome Stefan!
    What a fantastic story, I like the end!
    I hope to see the next chapter up on your blog soon:)
    Well done!

  9. That was totally specular!
    I love how people get left behind!
    I wonder what age you will be in next?
    I can't wait till the next chapter.

  10. If you read real carefully next up is the Ice age!

  11. Wow Stefan this spectacular.
    I am amazed that you have done three parts of this writing topic.
    Are you going to do more than three parts?
    Great work!

    1. I've still got two more as drafts!

  12. What a great story I can not wait for the next part. Keep up the great work and I liked the words that you used.

    From Casey.